


Worth It?

by JulzSnape



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angel Castiel, Angst, Archangel Gabriel (Supernatural), Bottom Dean, Continued by request, Destiel - Freeform, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, First Blade, First Time, Gabriel Being Gabriel, Gen, Gratuitous Smut, I Tried, Jessica Moore Lives, M/M, Mark of Cain, Mary Lives, Non-Hunter Winchesters, Season/Series 10, Seriously NSFW, Temporary Character Death, Time Travel, Top Castiel, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-13 04:38:22
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,700
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3368159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JulzSnape/pseuds/JulzSnape
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When things get out of control with the Mark of Cain and Dean does the unthinkable, he finally gets the chance to go back and do everything right, but there are conditions and sacrifices he's not quite ready to face. Will it be worth it?</p><p>UPDATE! Now with a second (smutty) chapter!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Going Back

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! This is based on a prompt from the FB page Destiel Forever, which I believe was shared from Tumblr. If you’re a Destiel fan and on FB, please come join our group if you haven’t already!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Supernatural! I am writing simply for pleasure and not profit. All rights belong to the CW and creator Erik Kripke!

The wind was roaring around the cabin, blowing around anything that wasn't bolted down. The windows had already shattered, and leaves and other debris were swirling around the living room, around Dean and Sam.

Sam was lying on the couch, his skin pale and a bloody wound gaping in his stomach. He wasn’t moving. Dean was standing beside the couch holding the first blade, tears streaming down his face, his rage and sorrow causing the sudden hurricane force winds.

“Help me fix this Cas, _please_ help me! I didn’t mean to!”

There was a sound of wings, and then Castiel was standing in the doorway of the cabin, shocked into stillness as he took in the scene in front of him. Dean was covered in blood, and it wasn't his own.

“Dean… _Dean_ , what did you _do_? Drop the blade!”

Dean turned his head to face the angel, his face screwed up in utter anguish, though his hand was still held firmly around the blade. He was shaking with emotion and rage. Castiel had never seen Dean so broken before, and considering everything they had been through together, that was saying something.

“I told him not to try to stop me, that the Mark was too strong now. I couldn’t control it! He got in my way, started trying to take the blade and I…I…Oh God, Cas you _have_ to help me!” Dean wailed, his body wracked with sobs as he looked back down at his little brother’s body.

Castiel moved forward slowly, unsure if it was wise to approach Dean in his current state. He got to the edge of the couch, about two feet from Dean, so that he could see the damage done to Sam. There was no doubt – Sam was gone.

“You know I can’t bring him back. I’m so sorry Dean, I can’t fix this.”

“Then go back in time and stop all of this shit from happening! Zach could do it! Why can’t you?”

“Because I’m not an arch angel; I don’t have the power to bend time. Please just drop the blade, ok? I’m so close to finding Cain, and then we can get the Mark off of you and stop this.”

“Fuck Cain! Fuck all of it! If nothing is going to bring Sammy back, then it can have me,” Dean growled, the utter rage in his face scaring Castiel, who could have sworn the elder Winchester’s eyes had flashed black.

Before Castiel could reply, there was another sound of wings, and suddenly Gabriel was on the other side of the couch, looking sadly down at Sam’s body.

“I can take you back, Dean, but you have to understand the consequences before I can do it,” Gabriel explained quietly, glancing up at the rage filled man.

Castiel moved forward and gripped Dean’s shoulder, against his better judgment. “Don’t do it! Messing with time is not a good idea. It could make things worse than they’ve already been.”

Dean gave Castiel a sad smile and gestured down at his brother. “They can’t possibly get any worse, Cas. I want to start over. I don’t want to do this anymore. I _can’t_.”

“If I take you back, everything in the last ten years will be reversed. None of it will have happened. Sam will still be at Stanford, your dad will still be searching for Azazel, and you’ll still be hunting alone. None of it will have happened, but you’re responsible for changing the course of history. If I send you back and you do everything the same, it won’t have mattered.”

“I won’t. I’ll leave Sammy the hell alone. I should never have gotten him involved again.”

Gabriel held his hand up, as if to say he wasn’t done yet. “There’s more. None of it will have happened, and no one will remember a thing…except you. You’ll remember everything, Dean – _everyone_. Once I take you back and you start changing things, there’s no turning back. I won’t be able to bring you back. Hell, I won’t even remember any of this. Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Dean, please don’t, there _has_ to be another way,” Castiel begged, turning the man to face him. His expression was desperate as he looked into Dean’s eyes, which were dull and defeated.

“Why wouldn’t you want me to go back and fix all of this, Cas? If I can make it so that Sam never gets involved and lives his apple pie life with Jess, I’m damn well doing it!” Dean said incredulously.

“Because you’ll never have met me, and I won’t remember you! You’ll remember me…but I won’t remember you,” Castiel explained, his voice strained as Dean’s expression turned to panic once more. Castiel could see the fear and indecision in the man’s eyes, and knew what he had to do.

“You’re right; who am I to stop you from making things better? Go, Dean. Maybe we’ll meet again somehow.”

Dean stood staring at the angel who had been such a huge part of his life for the last six years and felt his heart ache and his stomach churn. Could he really go back and erase everything, giving up Cas in the process? He’d remember the angel, remember everything they’d been through, remember how he felt about him, but Cas wouldn’t have a clue who he was, even if they did meet again.

But he could save Sam, and even his dad, and probably countless other people. He could fix every stupid mistake he’d made since pulling Sam out of Stanford, make things right for his brother. He would still have the knowledge he did now; if necessary, he could go back and do it all on his own without ever dragging his little brother into it.

Dean felt fresh tears rolling down his cheeks as he finally unclenched his fist and dropped the first blade. He turned to fully face his angel and raised a hand to cup Castiel’s cheek. “I’m sorry, Cas, but I have to. Please forgive me. I…I love you,” Dean stammered as he pulled the angel close and kissed him firmly on the lips, wrapping his arms tightly around him.

Castiel kissed back with all he was worth, clinging onto Dean even as the man reluctantly pulled away. “I forgive you, Dean. I’ve always loved you. Go…go on.”

Castiel only realized that he had tears streaming down his own cheeks when Dean pulled completely away and turned to Gabriel. He gave one short nod, his jaw set in determination. He glanced back at Castiel, who saw the passion burning in Dean’s eyes. That was the last thing he saw before Gabriel snapped his fingers, and everything went black.

~*~*~*~

Dean woke up to the sound of a laugh he thought he would never hear again. He couldn’t remember what had happened last night, but he felt like hammered shit. He slowly opened his eyes and glanced around, looking for the source of the laughter.

“Good morning, son! I guess your father made sure neither you nor Sam would remember Sam’s twenty-first birthday.”

Dean felt his heart slam into his throat as he clutched his head. He remembered everything. The last thing he remembered was looking into Cas’ tear filled eyes. He was going to be sick. But if Gabriel had only sent him back ten years, how was his mom alive?

“Mom?”

Mary Winchester leaned over the back of the couch Dean had passed out on and gave a mischievous smirk. “Would you like some nice greasy sausage and some runny eggs for breakfast? You must have been more drunk than Sam was; he was up an hour ago.”

Dean felt a smile stretch across his face as he reached up and grasped his mother’s hand in his own. “I missed you.”

Mary chuckled as she gave her son’s hand a gentle pat. “You were only gone for the weekend, Momma’s boy. How about a glass of water and some Aspirin instead? I’ll be right back.”

Dean laughed as he sat up and watched his mother walk into the kitchen – the kitchen of their old house in Lawrence. He decided it didn’t matter how Mary was alive, he wasn’t going to look that gift horse in the mouth.

**_~10 Years Later~_ **

The park was filled with giggling and hyper children running around the grassy field, chasing after frizzbies and kick balls, or playing tag with their friends and siblings. The sky was a perfect blue with only a few clouds to keep them cool; it was a beautiful day.

Dean was sitting on a blanket that was stretched out in the grass. His not so little brother was sitting beside him, and lying next to him was his gorgeous wife, Jess.

“Uncle Dean! Come chase us!” A little girl with brilliantly blue eyes and pale blonde hair yelled out to him.

“Your Uncle Dean is too old and frail, Cassie,” said Sam with a loving smile. He adored his little girl and spoiled her rotten, but Dean was no better.

Dean felt his chest ache at hearing his niece’s name, like every other time. Jess and Sam had decided to name their baby girl Cassandra, and often called her Cassie for short. Dean tried to make sure he called her Cassie too, but sometimes slipped up and called her Cas. No one noticed or said anything, but Dean could feel the pain ripping at him from the inside.

It had been ten long and mostly wonderful years since Gabriel had sent him back. Sam had graduated from Stanford Law and married Jess, John Winchester had never disappeared because Mary had never been killed, and Dean had helped him run an auto repair shop after they both vowed to give hunting up. His family always teased him about why he hadn’t found himself a nice girl and settled down yet, and Dean would always say he wasn’t the type to settle down, and he was glad to just play Uncle to his niece instead.

The truth was that Dean had tried dating over the last few years, but it never turned out well. He could never commit fully to the person he was dating because he still wasn’t over Cas. He probably never would be, and he felt that familiar despair clutching at his chest once more.

The most difficult part of all of this was being the only one to remember everything. Sometimes he would mention a memory from his past life to Sam, who would give him a strange look and ask if he was feeling ok. Dean would have to play it off like he was joking. There had been a few close calls, and he had struggled with depression for the last ten years. He knew his family worried for him, not sure how to help him.

Dean couldn’t talk to a single soul about any of it. Sometimes he felt so alone, and that was when he would pray to Castiel. He had no idea if the angel ever heard him, but he would pray and pray, tell him how much he missed him, and he hard it had been to try to live this normal life when he knew this wasn’t how things had been before. Dean hadn’t realized that when Gabriel said it would be his responsibility, how very lonely it would be.

~*~*~*~

Castiel sighed in annoyance and confusion. He rarely received prayers directly addressed to himself; most of the time when people prayed, it was directly to God. These prayers were filtered through his angels, who did what they could to help the humans in need.

However, there was one man who seemed to always pray directly to Castiel, and his prayers often made no sense to the angel whatsoever. The man would say that he missed Castiel, talk about things that had never happened, and there would be such a strong sense of longing and pain and regret that Castiel would feel compelled to go to this man, but Gabriel always stopped him.

“Is it that Winchester guy again?” Gabriel asked as Castiel flapped his wings in irritation.

“Yes, of course. He is talking about someone named Benny and purgatory. His longing for me is so strong it’s palpable. How can a human I have never met long for me? I am not sure if the man is just disturbed or if I am missing something,” Castiel explained like he had so many times before.

Gabriel gave his brother a searching look, wondering if the angel would ever uncover the truth. “I don’t think you’re missing anything, Castiel. The man may have just read your name somewhere and prays to you. He must be deranged.”

Castiel shook his head as he listened to the human pray that it was so lonely to remember everything and have no one to talk to, but that it had to be worth it because Sam was happy and had a family. “No, I don’t think he is. It’s like he knows things no one else does. If I could only go down to earth and speak with him, maybe – ”

“No. You know our father does not want you leaving the host for earth, Castiel. We are not to interact directly with humans,” said Gabriel.

Castiel just glared at his brother as he tried to push away the strong feelings of longing and pain that this human was sending to him in waves. “You’re one to talk. This man is in pain, Gabriel. I only want to help.”

“There’s nothing to be done. I’m sorry.”

Castiel sighed again as he watched his brother leave. He focused once more on the human’s prayers and felt his own sort of longing to help this man who seemed to need him, for whatever reason. “I am sorry, Dean Winchester,” Castiel whispered as he could hear the tears in the man’s voice as he continued to pray.

~*~*~*~

“It has to be worth it, Cas, it just _has_ to be. Sam is happy and married and has a gorgeous little girl. Mom is alive and dad is so happy. I did this to make everything better, and it has been…for them. I miss you so much though, and there’s no one else to talk to. I don’t even know if you hear me. You probably think I’m insane if you do because you won’t remember anything.

“It was worth it…it was worth it, it _has_ to be,” Dean croaked through his tears, the horrible, clawing loneliness tearing open his chest and shredding his heart to pieces. It had to be worth the pain he was in, or else Dean had simply traded one mistake for another. “It was worth it…”


	2. Together Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten years of strange prayers and curiosity prompts Castiel to finally go to the man who has been longing for him. It was time to find Dean Winchester and uncover the truth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After many requests to continue this story, I decided one more chapter wouldn't hurt. Please note that the rating has been changed to explicit and there is sexual content in this chapter!

Although he knew it was extremely against the rules set in place by his father, and something Gabriel had just warned him not to do, Castiel was too curious about this human named Dean Winchester who so desperately prayed to him nearly every night for the last ten years. He had made himself either ignore the prayers, or shut them out when they became too much to bear, but Castiel couldn’t help it any longer.

This man was in agonizing pain, so much that Castiel could actually feel it, and angels weren’t supposed to be able to feel human emotion. He also felt drawn to Dean, like something was pulling at his grace, telling him he needed to go to this man, and that this man was important and needed him.

So, while Gabriel was off teaching a garrison of cherubs to fly, Castiel decided it was time to make his first trip to earth.

~D~C~

It was near closing time at Winchester Auto, and Dean was beat. After rebuilding the shitty engine of a Ford Contour that would have been cheaper to replace with an entirely different car, Dean was ready to crack open a few beers and relax in front of his TV at home. Maybe he would try to cajole his mom into making him dinner, and maybe she’d throw in a pie. As Dean was pulling out his phone to text his mom, Andy, the front desk kid who was mentoring under Dean to become a mechanic, tapped him on the shoulder from behind.

“Hey Dean, there’s this guy in the lobby looking for you. He looks intense and honestly kind of scary, man,” Andy said with a shrug.

Dean couldn’t recall any hard ass customers lately and tried to rack his brain for anyone he might have pissed off recently, but he came up blank. “Uh, ok. Give me a minute to wash up a little and get this grease off. Did he say his name or what he wanted?”

“Nah, he just came in, looked straight at me and said ‘I need Dean Winchester immediately’. He kind of creeped me out with that weird trench coat. I thought he was going to flash me for a second,” Andy chuckled.

Dean felt his stomach drop like he had missed a step going down stairs. Scary, intense man wearing a trench coat…could it be – ? Dean immediately shut himself down and tried to not overreact. There could be hundreds of intense men who owned trench coats in the world, it was just a coincidence. He decided he didn’t need as thorough a scrubbing as he originally intended and instead wiped his hands half-heartedly on a towel.

“Thanks Andy, I’ll go see what he wants,” Dean said, and tried to ignore how shaky his voice had become.

Dean took a deep breath to calm himself down before turning the handle on the lobby door and walking in. He nearly fell to his knees at the sight of Castiel standing in his lobby, trench coat, backwards blue tie and wind swept hair all in place. Dean could feel his heart thudding against his ribs as he tried to control his breathing.

“C-Cas? Man, is that you?”

“Dean Winchester, I have come to find out what all of your prayers to me have been about these last ten years.”

Dean could feel the burning behind his eyes as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Of course Castiel wouldn’t remember anything. Gabriel had told him that the only one who would remember anything would be Dean, and so far that had been true. He was stupid to think that maybe – just _maybe_ , Castiel would have been different.

“Shit, uh…ok, give me a minute and we can go back to my place and talk, alright?” Dean said as he prepared to tell Andy to lock up for him and grab the keys to the Impala. Before Dean could turn around, Castiel had walked forward and placed two fingers on Dean’s forehead, and he felt the terrible sensation of travel-by-angel he hadn’t felt in ten long years.

When Dean opened his eyes, they were standing in the middle of his living room. Castiel was staring intently at him as if trying to read his mind. Shit, he probably _was_ reading his mind.

“Damn it, Cas, I hate when you do that. I have a car!”

“I apologize. What is a car?” Castiel asked, his head cocked to the side and his brow scrunched together in confusion.

Dean felt a pang in his heart, seeing classic Cas right there in front of him. But this wasn’t his Cas; this wasn’t the angel who had pulled him out of hell, who had stuck with him through thick and thin, had saved his and Sammy’s lives multiple times. This wasn’t the Castiel who loved him, and Dean felt sick.

“Never mind. Look, I don’t know how to explain my prayers. I thought that maybe you didn’t actually hear them, considering it’s been ten years and it’s been radio silence from you, Cas,” Dean said as he sat down heavily on his couch and scrubbed a hand over his face. This was too surreal. He wanted to be happy that Castiel had come to him, but he knew this wasn’t his Cas and that hurt more than anything else.

Castiel sat beside Dean and fixed him with that same searching look. “I have heard all of your prayers, Dean. I am sorry I never answered any of them. I was not allowed to, and I admit I am confused about much of your prayers. You speak of things that did not happen, you yearn for me in such a way that it physically hurts, and yet I have never met you. Gabriel says that you’re deranged, but I don’t believe that is true. You are damaged, Dean Winchester – broken – and I feel like it is my fault, but I cannot figure out why. Please, tell me what I’ve done.”

Dean tried to hold back his tears as all the pain of the last ten years without Castiel came flooding into his mind. For years he had prayed to Castiel at night, crying himself to sleep as he poured his heart out to the angel. He talked about how much he missed and loved Castiel, and how he wasn’t sure it had been worth it to turn back time and redo it all.

Then Dean would feel terrible that he ever thought a reality in which Sammy was gone would ever be worth it. He was so torn. He would have been devastated without his brother, had he chose not to go back ten years, but there were times Dean was not so sure that the pain of losing Cas wasn’t worse than the pain of losing Sam would have been.

“Cas…you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry about all the prayers; I’m sure they don’t make any damn sense to you and have been driving you crazy. What happened…it was my fault, my _choice_. I don’t think you would believe me even if I told you.”

“So show me,” Castiel said, lifting his hand to Dean’s forehead with a questioning look in his eyes, as if asking permission.

“How?”

“Just let me in, I’ll find it,” Castiel explained.

Would that be fair to Cas? If Dean showed him the alternate timeline, he wasn’t sure how the angel would feel. He didn’t want to ruin the peace Castiel had in this timeline, still clearly a faithful and obedient angel. But then he wouldn’t be alone…he wouldn’t have to bear the burden of what really happened all by himself. Dean had battled with telling someone else, especially Sam, for the last ten years, but he had not been willing to put his brother through the pain and guilt of knowing what Dean had done to him, and what he had ultimately done to fix everything.

“Ok, I’ll show you,” Dean said as he met Castiel’s piercing blue eyes and gave a single nod.

Like a strange film reel, everything that had happened in Dean’s alternate reality started flashing before his eyes. He could feel Castiel’s presence, and felt the flood of warring emotions as the angel saw himself saving Dean, breaking away from heaven and attaining free will, all the wonderful and terrible things he had done in heaven and on earth.

The flashes of memories came to a stop at the very last one before Dean was sent back by Gabriel. He saw himself kissing Cas, telling the angel he loved him, and seeing his tear stained and broken expression as Gabriel touched two fingers to Dean’s forehead, then everything went black.

Dean’s eyes flew open as he heard and felt Castiel hyperventilating beside him, and he quickly reach out to the angel, grabbing one of his hand’s to help anchor him in the present.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I knew I shouldn’t have showed you, it was too much. Cas, please – ”

“ _Dean_.”

Dean stopped as he finally met Castiel’s tear filled eyes, and something had changed. This wasn’t the angel who had walked into his lobby and demanded to speak with him. There was a knowledge and pain in his eyes that Dean knew all too well.

“ _Cas?_ How? Gabriel said no one else would ever remember!”

“Dean, my grace. You have a piece of my grace still, from when I raised you from hell and put you back together again. It still held my memories. That’s why I’ve always felt so drawn to you; it was my grace calling me. I’m so sorry I didn’t come to you ten years ago, but Gabriel always stopped me – ”

Castiel suddenly had an intense look of unadulterated rage on his face as he stood and stared toward the ceiling. “Gabriel, you get your ass down here _right now!_ ”

There was the familiar rustle of wings as Gabriel appeared in Dean’s living room, his expression sheepish as he refused to me either set of eyes that were glaring at him. “Dean-o! Ten long years, old pal! How’s this reality working for ya’?”

“You knew! You fucking bastard, you knew the entire time! Why? _Why_ wouldn’t you let Cas keep his memories if you didn’t lose them either?” Dean demanded as he stood beside Cas, gently holding the angel’s wrist to try to keep him from smiting his own brother.

“Because, Dean, that was part of the deal. I wasn’t just sending you back to fix your fuck ups, I was sending everyone back to fix everything we had done wrong. This was our second chance to regain control of heaven and restore the balance on earth. I knew if I let Castiel keep his memories, history would just repeat itself.”

“Then why not take my memories too? I’ve spent ten fucking years hating myself for letting Cas go. You couldn’t throw me a bone, man?” Dean croaked as he felt a lump form in his throat. He didn’t really want Gabriel to have taken his memories too. He couldn’t imagine any reality where he didn’t love Cas.

“I planned to; I was just waiting for the right moment. It was going to be soon. I’m sorry, to both of you. I tried not to play God, but unfortunately even in this reality, Dad is a deadbeat. Someone had to do something to un-fuck the universe. Please don’t hate me, brother,” Gabriel pleaded as he reached out to Castiel, a look of mingled fear and pain in his expression.

“I do not hate you, Gabriel, but do not think I will ever forgive you for this. I understand why you did what you did, but that does not erase all the pain Dean has been through, all the lost time. Go, we will speak later,” Castiel insisted as he turned his back on his brother and met Dean’s eyes once more.

Gabriel left without another word, and Dean felt his knees going weak as Cas gripped his arm. “Do you really remember, or did you just see my memories and figure it all out?”

“I remember, Dean. I’m so sorry; I should have come when I first heard your prayers. As soon as my grace touched the remnants that remained in you, it uncovered my memories. Angels aren’t like humans; Gabriel could not have erased my memories, he just hid them.”

Dean finally let the tears he had been holding back flood his eyes as he pulled Castiel into his arms, feeling the angel grasp him just as tight. “Fuck, Cas, I missed you so fucking much. It’s like I haven’t been able to breathe normally for ten years,” Dean choked as he buried his face in Castiel’s neck.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Dean said as he pulled away from the embrace, only to grasp the angel’s face and pull him into a heated kiss. Dean tried to pour all of the love, pain, fear, confusion, and longing he had held inside for the last ten years into the kiss. He nipped at the angel’s bottom lip and slipped his tongue inside, exploring Castiel’s mouth as the angel kissed him back just as passionately.

Dean felt himself being pushed backwards, towards the wall. He let himself be pushed up against the wall as Castiel kissed the breath out of him. He let out an embarrassing gasp as Castiel lifted him so that his legs wrapped around the angel’s hips, their cloth covered groins grinding together in pure ecstasy.

“Fuck, Cas. Please…please, I need you.”

Before Dean could even catch his breath, he was suddenly on his back in bed, both his clothes and Castiel’s completely missing as the first skin on skin contact sent fire burning through every nerve of Dean’s body.

“Dean,” Castiel practically growled against Dean’s throat as the angel left hot, open mouthed kisses all over Dean’s neck and chest.

Dean was pulling Cas harder against him, their cocks rubbing together roughly as he thrust up, and pulled the angel down against him. “Holy shit, yes. Please Cas, fuck me.”

Dean felt his cock became even harder as Castiel forcefully flipped him over onto his stomach, then grabbed his legs and bent them at the knees so that his ass was up in the air and his chest was pressed into the mattress.

He didn’t have any time to think before he felt the heat and blinding pleasure of Castiel’s tongue brushing wetly over his entrance. Dean couldn’t even form words, just grunted and moaned into his pillow as the angel behind him continued to lap at his hole, then pointing his tongue, carefully fucked Dean open.  

“Fuck! Oh fuck, Cas, please don’t stop,” Dean babbled as Castiel’s tongue speared him open over and over. Dean’s legs were shaking and his cock felt fit to burst. He was sure he was going to come without Castiel having touched his cock a single time, then Cas pulled away. Dean let out an undignified whine in disappointment, then took it back as he felt two finger carefully starting to push into him.

“Is this ok, Dean?”

“This is perfect, Cas. I need more. Please, just fuck me. I’m ready,” Dean practically begged. Cas continued to fuck him slowly and torturously with those two fingers, carefully pushing in and twisting just at the right time as the angel crooked his fingers and brushed slowly over his prostate. Dean shouted as he pushed his ass back against Castiel’s hand, fucking himself on the angel’s fingers.

Dean was grateful when Castiel finally stopped the torture and flipped Dean back over so that they were face to face once more. He instinctively wrapped his legs around Castiel’s hips as he felt the blunt head of his cock pressing at his entrance.

“Are you sure you’re ready? I don’t wish to hurt you,” Castiel asked as he gently rubbed a hand from just above Dean’s cock, all the way up over his stomach to his chest. Dean felt goose bumps follow the angel’s hand as he thrust his hips forward.

“I’ve never been more ready for anything in my life, Cas. _Please_.”

That was all the prompting Cas needed as he finally, _finally_ , pushed his cock past the tight ring of muscles. He went slow, so slow that Dean was shaking with need by the time Cas had bottomed out.

“Move, for the love of fuck, Cas, _move!_ ” Dean grunted as Castiel started to thrust in earnest. He was bent nearly in half as Castiel leaned forward to kiss him, his thrusts going deeper at this new angle. Dean thrust back as much as he could, slamming his ass down to meet Castiel’s hips.

Castiel bent his legs up a little further, and Dean felt all the air punch out of him as Castiel’s cock repeatedly slammed against his prostate. He was close, his cock throbbing almost painfully between them as Castiel mouthed as his neck and chest, his breath coming in broken gasps as he fucked Dean into the mattress.

It was everything Dean had always dreamed, and more. He had not allowed himself to think of being like this with Castiel for many years, not until near the end when he had finally admitted to himself that he was definitely in love with his best friend. He knew sex with Cas would be intense, powerful, but he never imagined how liberating and free he would feel, finally giving in to something his very soul had longed for after so many years.

“Dean, I love you so much. I’m so sorry I haven’t been here for you, but I’m not going anywhere ever again,” Castiel croaked, still slamming into Dean with all he was worth.

Dean wasn’t even sure he could form words as the moment, so he pulled Castiel down into a kiss, wordlessly returning all of Castiel’s sentiments. As Cas slammed into Dean two, three more times, Dean gave a hoarse cry as his orgasm ripped through him, come splashing between their bellies, his cock untouched.

Castiel followed soon after, the tightness milking him as he fucked deeper and deeper into Dean, spilling everything. He collapsed against Dean, his breathing labored as he trailed kisses against the man’s neck.

Dean was speechless for long moments as they both caught their breath, the sweat cooling on their overheated bodies in the slightly chilly air of his room. “That was…fucking phenomenal.”

“Yes, I think I agree. I don’t even sleep, and I want to sleep now.”

Dean’s chuckles turned into full on raucous laughter as he shifted so that he and Castiel were lying facing each other, their arms and legs tangled together. They fit together like puzzle pieces, two halves of the same whole that had been broken without the other to hold them together.

“Stay with me. Please don’t fly off in the middle of the night, ok?”

Castiel lifted his head to look into Dean’s eyes, a slow smile spreading across his face. “I won’t, not ever again. I’m here to stay, Dean.”

Dean buried his face in the angel’s neck as Castiel snapped his fingers, pulling the blanket out from underneath them to cover them instead. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Dean Winchester.”

**END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So did I do part 2 justice? Please let me know what you think! At this time, I do not plan to continue this story, though that's what I said with the first chapter...lol.

**Author's Note:**

> So, was it worth it? Let me know in a comment!


End file.
